brca bullshit

The more things change, the more they stay the same…

I haven’t posted publicly for about a year (not-so-coincidentally, that was about the amount of time it took to plan and have out wedding). Naturally, lot of things are different now! I have a new husband, a new last name (albeit not yet “officially”) and we will (hopefully soon) be moving into a new rental property, with the goal of finding a house to settle down in in the next few years.

I passed the two-year anniversary of my mastectomy quietly, and began seeing an integrative medicine doctor for help with my food allergies and overall health. I removed myself from all prescription medications and began taking supplements to help heal my immune system and my “leaky gut”. I tested positive for a boatload more mutations, all of which are indicative of malabsorption of vitamins, and have been working on figuring out how to compensate for those losses directly. It has helped, but only minimally, and has been really hard to stick to a grain-free sugar-free diet since the wedding cake took me so far off course!

Still, with all those changes, I am in pain. Constantly. Sometimes so much so that I am depressed for my own life and the life of my new (wonderful, supportive) husband. Will I ever be able to have kids? Will I ever be able to walk the dog without a nap afterwards? Will I ever feel “normal” after eating again? I’m hanging in there, and I’m so, so grateful for everything that I have and all the things that are in store for us as a newly-married couple, but I do wonder how much I will be able to enjoy.

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